Get happy, make a list, write it down...

I have been reading a fantastic book, The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin . First off, I highly recommend it. It's one of those book that chooses you, when your ready. No matter who picks it up, it will shift and re-frame your beliefs and definitions about what we need, want, will never be and can accept in order to find the elusive get of "happiness".

It got me focused and a little high on the promise and pursuit of smiles and emotional freedom. I have always been a little corny and interested in esoteric thinking ( I meditate, do yoga) but to try and break down what makes ME happy was a whole other ball of proverbial glee-wax. I implore you to sit, even if only for ten minutes or so and contemplate what it is that makes you happy, feel good and enjoy your life. That is step one...a good place to start. I will try here. After this, I might try and put some into action. Who knows

Things that make me happy:

- A good sunshine filled day ( I can't control this...hm)

- The sound of my children's laughter, especially if I produced it.

- Unexpected empathy.

- Unplanned evenings that end in revelry, laughter and good friendship-bonding.

- A yoga session that leaves me tingly and energetic.

- Playful attention from a beautiful or funny man. ( including, but not limited to my husband)

- Multiple orgasms

- Chocolate English toffee

- The smell of my 2yr old's "blankie"

- Being productive and efficient

- A nice fitting dress

- Feeling and giving love

I plan on digging deeper and truly finding broad based mantra's or "commandments" as Gretchen Rubin does. I have a sneaky feeling it will lead to much more fulfilling outcomes. For now, I stick with what I can list.

What do Joe Manganiello, Alec Baldwin and Ryan Gosling have in common?

Okay, so the need to be trite and dirty has overwhelmed me and I shall share. The latest in my Top 3 Bed em', Get em' are as follows. Marriage is grand, love is beautiful, but days are long and what fun would it be to pretend that lust for outside hotties dies with fulfilling matrimony.

Here they are. Hold onto your panties, and DRINK THEM IN.

Coming in at # 1- JOE *howl* MANGANIELLO

This smoking hot 6 foot 5 inch beef cake is stunning. He plays a wolf in Seas

on 3 and 4 of TRUE BLOOD on HBO. More importantly, he is a good solid age (34) where I might actually want to talk to him, whilst I'm licking his abs. Those deep set-dark eyes, and that Italian tickle-me-hoo-ha nose is too yummy. Keep an eye out. You know I will.

Second to none: (but maybe one...see above,

for now) ALEC BALDWIN:Anyone who has stuck with me, know that I have been in love with Alec Baldwin through the tumult that h

asbeen his career and celebrity. I didn't

hate him wit

h the contrived, and baited phone messages thing. I never thought he was getting old. I swooned at his re-start and return, and I still get tickled pink at his humor and hard-core left views. He is funny, and serious, and sexy. I literally day-dream about our intellectual sparring matches followed by some nude yoga and post-coital banter. I see him smacking my butt as I walk past the flapping sheer white curtains onto the deck in East Hampton...wait am I getting carried away? He is also dating a 28 yr old yogini (like me, e

except add 5 years and 2 kids) but stick with the delusion. He likes brown girls...there is hope yet....

Thirdly, RYAN GOSLING:

People, this man played his ass off in "Blue Valentine" and has true acting chops, but he also has some serious meat on his bones. Emma Stone said it best in his latest, soon-to-be out movie: "Crazy, Stupid, Love"- "You look photo shopped!". I have loved him since he jibber-jabbered

about being a bird with Rachel McAdams in "The Notebook". I could write a notebook full of the things I would want to do with him. I don't want him to love me like I do with Alec Baldwin. I just want him to...well, you'll have to wait for my notebook.

Here's to men and sexuality and dreaming that both meet the needs and wants of our expectations!

The world may be ugly, but today Civil Rights prevail!

I've been contimplating the return to the blogosphere. Today seemed as good as any. Most days lately sound like an apocalyptic byline to a movie....

This Sunday the world is mourning at least 92 innocent Norwegian kids and adults shot down at a camp by a White-supremacists. Amy Winehouse's body finally gave up on trying to stay viable with the heroin and alcohol she festered in for the past 5 years. I will say I believe her talent and purity in music is a total loss, her soul I fear, will be better off at peace.

The bi-partisan government is fighting over paying OUR national bills. Truly, if the US gets a less than triple Moody's rating we are in uncharted territory, yet pissing match ensues. Super. Whole new meaning to pissing it all away. NFL and NBA are on lock-out because during our recession, the millionaire athletes and owners are fighting over the pie. Japan is dealing with radioactive beef due to a Chernobyl-esque situation that no one will admit to yet. England is facing Rupert Murdoch's fall from self-righteous grace because his company has been raiding and tapping personal info, phone lines and email accounts of celebrities, 911-victims and more absurd story subjects.

On the bright side, NYC is celebrating the first day where Gay Marriage is 100% legal. Civil rights are being recognized and reveled in and that, my friends is something to be proud of. Take a hard look at hetero-marriage, make a case that its been well-protected, preserved and cast an idyllic example...Right. It's reputation can go now where but up. 'Nuff said.

If ever there were a time for me to get back into meditation, and spurting out nonsense that only 3 people read, it is now. I am back to cheer you on, keep you informed, and hopefully, possibly inspire you pay more attention, live with more love and give all you have to be better, and brighter.

No sooner than a week from now, I will be back in full throttle commenting on the latest sexting scandal, recommended music, being quasi-political, quoting good movies and probably rambling on about sex. That's what you get. You just read this far...you're in it now.

Until then...

Tips for you Rep. Christopher Lee lovers...wannabes:

Alrighty cheaters, listen up! I know my time would be better served watching CNN right now, as the fate of Egypt unfolds to the tune of Anderson Cooper's voice, but here I am instead...multi-tasking.

We all know that GOP Rep. Chris Lee loves ladies. We know that Republicans love his hair. We know that he is married, 46 years old and has a young son. More interestingly, he isn't so smart. (on many levels, but let's stick with horny stuff.) The "leggy" lady who received his photo, and within 6 hours of his sexy big fingers punching the "send" button, he was resigning. Think about that. You know when you get that tummy-drop and sweaty prickly feeling that the universe sends you to give you the heads up that you just did a DUMB DUMB thing? Yep. He does too. So some lessons to learn here:

1. DO NOT lie about your age. What is it with saying

39"? People like to avoid 40. 40 is grand and distinguished. The thing is, a girl finds out your lying about your age and she is immediately going to want to call you out. Send your bare hairless chest to Gawker...maybe not, but still. C'mon.

2. DO NOT show your flexing fist....'Nuff said. Dude? Really....and see point 1. No one is really in awe at those guns, or your sucked in tummy. Stop. Just stop.

3. DO NOT show your face. WHAT? (sigh) If you are married, have a child, and sending a sexy* picture out into the oblivion to a stranger. Take SOME precaution. Jeez, no one could figure out Favre's man-meat cause it was attached to nothing. TECHNICALLY, it was debatable. AND...too rotten for mass media to make viral.

4. DO NOT use a gmail account with your REAL NAME, that is also attached to your FACEBOOK account. This is getting painful. Honestly, my 5 year old already knows how to cover her tracks when she watches "Spongebob Squarepants"...she changes the channel twice (Disney, then PBS) so as not to be found out on the "LAST" button.

5. DO NOT jump ship so quick. I think if Spitzer would have been caught sending a topless picture and NOT humping a hooker, he would of laid it out straight like he does on CNN. Shit, Clinton would have laughed a little, patted the back of whomever was near him when he found out the pic leaked and said: "Aw, boys...looks like someone hacked my account and sent a picture I took for Hilary to the young, lost woman trying to make a buck." -That's genius.

The little leggy lady said it herself: "people cheat everyday, only the dumb ones get caught."

To take a look at Little Lee's pectorals and fists...take a gander and CLICK HERE.

Ponder this cautionary tale. Think harder, fluff and flex less and be smart.

Thursday Roundoup

On this third day of February, the world is an interesting place....

-In Cairo, the army has stepped in to manage the pro-and anti-Murbarak crowds. I have a sneaking suspicion what CNN is giving us is only the tip of the pyramid. Jordan's new reining Abdullah, and the turmoil bubbling in Yemen and the whole

Mideast. Image: Getty Images

Is anyone else thinking of that silly Mayan prediction of the end of the world in 2012? Hm....

- Wall Street executive paydays broke a record. Total Compensation hit 135 BILLION in 2010. Crazy to think the market crashed, and bailouts ensued only 2 years ago. Curious. Very curious.

- Charlie Sheen is a waste of space in news media/TV and his daughter's lives.

- New movies out tomorrow: "Sanctum" and "Roomate"....yawn.

In better news, the groundhog in Pennsylvania did NOT see his shadow. For the silly and superstitious, this means our Spring will come early. I'm happy to believe it after witnessing the cursed Snowtastic mess of Chicago yesterday. 21" of snow, followed by a deep freeze drop to -5 today. Wooo hoooo for winter.

Book Review: Lotus Eaters

Okay. Here we go, what's it been? Eight months? More...who cares. I have spent my time doing many a thing, none-of-which I am particularly in the mood to share. However, In some twist of events, or rather my halting writer's block, I have been reading a book a week. The latest book to move me was The Lotus Eaters by Tatjana Soli.

I had seen this book a few times and passed over it, skimming the back, having no interest in war. One day, as I was longing for more than my usual chick-lit pop, I opened the book with the interest in love triangles. (That is how People Magazine had described it in a blurb.) This book is more than three lovers. Although their passion and pulling and pushing does bring a reader to the brink. It is so much more. Set in the late sixties and seventies in Saigon and all over Vietnam during the war- the landscape is breath-taking.

The main character is a young, female photography with a secret mission to understand warand the loss of her brother and father. Through her eyes you encounter the very grey line between the enemy and the nationalist and the voyeurs looking to make some money on the carnage. She falls in love with a weathered (Rob Redford-type in my head) photojournalist, assimilates quickly and faces unspeakable truths of a country and it's people I knew nothing about. Throughout her disillusionment, I found that I was carried away in the mist and muck of the adrenaline rush of war and fear and love.

The story unfolds and lays out with tension and suspense and aching heart. I couldn't put it down. I am embarrassed to admit I didn't know much about the Vietnam war other than the award winning movies Hollywood made. This book is thoughtful in its depiction of the waste of war, the addiction of one's passion, the hole of loss and the beauty of love.

Hold onto your heart and brace your stomach. This book will not disappoint.

Greenberg quotes that made me cry laughing...

Sure, I haven't been blogging for a looooong time. I know. I'm sorry. I'm raising two kids under 5 and trying to stay sane. Writing usually does the trick, but lately, I'm trying to write things of meaning. That's not panning out so well, so I will go back to my fun stuff. Commentary. Today, specifically, I want to applaud the genius of Noah Baumbach's direction and writing, as well as Ben Stiller. His portrayal in GREENBERG was shockingly deep and perfect.

The movie is about a New-Yorker, recently out of the hospital after a nervous breakdown. He house sits in LA and finds himself in a desperate but very honest display of the human need to connect and not feel alone with his brother's 25 year old assistant. The plot is somewhat relevant, but way more interesting is all the beautiful awkward, and all too common moments of life that, well, just happen. Stiller has a haunting way of being neurotic and self-consumed, yet thoughtful and full of heightened awareness. I laughed literally every five minutes. Some times it was how biting his tongue was, others were the strange irony and weirdness of over communication or lack there of. Most of the time it was at the attempt of apathy in the face of his true disappointment and how brooding and deflecting is not really funny, but somehow Ben Stiller finds away to translate the dark into humorous and smart.

Some of my favorite quotes (rough, since from memory) from Greenberg:

Roger Greenberg: "This is why I don't f'ing go out....I can't find ONE movie I like at a multiplex, or I go to a Starbucks and I LIKE the music they're playing..."

Roger Greenberg: "Why are all the grown men dressed like kids, and the kids are dressed like super heros?"

Roger Greenberg: "No! No! No! See!? This is why I should be dating a 38 year old divorcee with teen kids and low expectations!"

This movie is clearly not for everybody. A good friend told me I'm either very observant or a little more warped then most for laughing as hard as I did, as frequently as I did. It was sincere to me. I honestly, believe Stiller's character, yet because the dialogue was so smart and so TRUE, it met in a perfect place of levity. It feels a bit like Woody Allen, but so contemporary and wistful of the past.

Stiller is notable for showing true discontentment with how things have turned out. Great music references, movie references (Wall Street- Charlie Sheen moment of hilarity), and he oscillates between being proud of his indifference, to being truly embarrassed. His letters of complaints merely scratch the surface of how disgruntled he has become, yet Ben Stiller plays the role so well you want to hug him or smack him on the back of the head and hand him a beer. There is a little bit of him in all of us. Some are just more comfortable admitting it.

Conan quits "The Tonight Show" if it slots for 12:05.

AND SO HE SHOULD!!!! What a joke. Conan O'brien has been screwed by the NBC boomer-pleasing executives. Since this has all played out as such, I will no longer pretend that "The Office" hasn't gotten painfully boring and I will only watch the genius of "30 Rock" online or at Hulu.

Conan speaks to a different generation, yes. He is goofy, but I am tired of the noise about how he is too slap-stick or vulgar. He is warm hearted, intelligently funny with a strong pulse on the modern masses of generations, still having an old-TV feel about him. I am disproportionally angry that he moved his life and family and had a pure excitement about the honor of hosting the Tonight Show. Now, its all dispensable? Unbelievable. Think what you want of him, say what you will, but he is innovative, hilarious, and reminds so many of my generation that you can be silly, stupid (even) and still care about politics and the world and the state of affairs in America. It's despicable how so many people who don't bother to watch him, and jump on the band-wagon to say he is "obnoxious" seem to have any valid right to speak about what his show does or does not do.

*sigh* Rant concluded. I will follow you wherever I can Conan. You will be missed if you don't pop up somewhere else wit your lanky limbs and floppy hair. More missed, will be your keen self-awareness when delivering a less-than-par punch line or your honest to goodness conversational gift with the star and starlets of Hollywood. Your famously forward taste in music,Your infectious giggle, and your reactions to a cut from a wacky animal or a swear word slipped in by a guest is reflective of our own geeky prude and acknowledgment in one. You made me laugh so many nights (and mornings- when DVR'd) that I'm not quite sure what to do with myself. Go on you for not being pushed around!

To read Conan's full statement Click Here

"Up in the Air" is heavy hearted food for thought

I have seen (on average) a movie a week this year. I go alone, I review to no one in particular and I enjoy the journey, good or bad of escapism in the form of an empty, dark theatre. Lately, I've watched "Avatar", "Precious", "It's Complicated", "Boys are back", "Twilight", "Every body's Fine" and on and on. I can not compare any of them to "Up in the Air". Jason Reitman (director of Juno) has done it again.

I must say off the bat, it is a sad movie. It is not going to send you bouncing out of the theatre, give you a new lease on life, or make you want to run out and kiss someone. The simple premise is in and of itself depressing: A man travels 320 days a year as a hired-third party that restructures companies and fires people. What makes this movie a gem to me is all the captured emotions, and opposing views on life. Natalie Keener (Anna Kendrick) the young girl (someone I totally would have recognized in the mirror when I was 22- No joke her wardrobe was created from my closet in 2000-2002) over-confident in the idealism of life plans, love and the pursuit of success coupled with Ryan Bignham( George Clooney's character) unimpressed by companionship and love, make for some huge laughs. So much is spoken between them circumstantially, and in the facial expressions.

What I find even more moving about this movie is the honesty with which the lives are portrayed. The loneliness, and absolute confusion and second-guessing with which we all live our lives. Overall disappointment and the beautiful freedom found when letting go of expectations... Expectations of what we think we need, want and even our expectations of what we think others should want. It is heavy. The side story of Ryan (Clooney) and Alex (Vera Farmiga) starts off sweet and endearing with all the beaming qualities of mature adults choosing singledom over commitment, and ends a little more murky than expected.

It is a little dreary at times, but with every moment you feel sadness creeping over you like a deep fog, something charming happens. Young, Anna Kendrick calls Clooney out as "building a cocoon of self-alienation." Going on to tell him that he builds his life in such a way that makes it impossible for him to ever really get close to anyone, yet when he finds a women insane enough to run the gauntlet of his obnoxious world, and make it to the other side smiling, he doesn't even have the decency to label the relationship as anything better than "casual." "You re a teenager!" She yells.

Even better are the profoundly poignant moments between the college grad and Clooney's love interest. (Farmiga) Youth has a way of being so ignorant and bold at the same time, yet the female-protector comes out and instead of berating Anna on her naivete, she encourages her with honest interpretations of a woman in her mid-30's and the difference between "settling" and choosing what matters more. The screen ruminates with a maternal and compassionate quality from Farmiga. Without it, the movie might not have soared so well.

I'm not even touching base on Clooney's family, the hardship and pain of the people getting fired (which some were cast/edited from a documentary of REAL people recently let go), and the humor that Jason Bateman brings to each scene he is in. Overall the movie isn't a feel good show, but it reminds us of our innate drive to connect with people. It leaves you wistful of the bliss of having so much time ahead of you to waste on pretentious self-goals, and keeps you focused on making the most of what you have and could have now. Clooney's lone-wolf life has some redeeming points...avoiding all the "arguments, negotiations, and endless compromise" of relationships, and the his simple view of "I don't see the value" in marriage and having kids. But, somehow, as self-sufficient and free his life seems, he is underwhelmed. Perhaps, no more than a happily married couple who finds themselves married for 10 years, which is what makes this movie so great and relatable.

Here is the trailer:




See it. ( I did twice.) Its remarkably touching, beautifully written dialogue, giggle worthy, and sure to leave you contemplating what love, life, connection, coupling off and human nature means to you.

PS: Great song from the movie: "Help Yourself" by Sad Brad Smith.

2010 starts with sex, mediocrity and good intentions.

Happy New Year to the three people still reading this blog!!! First off, I need to say a few things: I DID NOT sleep with Tiger Woods, I do, however, know what happened on Thanksgiving day at his house, and where and why he was in Arizona. I would tell you, but IMG would have me shot.

I also want to throw my little specs of disdain at Warren Beatty for admitting to having slept with 14,000 plus women. Nasty. Sanford, Leanne Rimes,David Letterman, (who somehow is totally forgivable to me), and in general, I am tired of hearing about all these people and their "transgressions." With so many more important things to talk about, it seems silly fodder.

So...Let's talk about the Bachelor! Holy hell what is happening to TV, dating and the demise of the sanctity of that silly ideal called "love" in general? Every single woman that popped a heel out of the limo had a gimmick. Either she tried to walk like a feline and tripped onto him, brought a basket of "sweets" as parting gifts, a love-o-meter, a pair aviator glasses...etc. I was walking in circles in my living room at the sheer awkwardness of it all.

I am willing a new year of more meaning and less marginal integrity. I am hoping that we stop keeping track of people's personal mistakes and focus on one's that actually effect the rest of the world. Until then, I plan to review every movie I see, I tend to write more, listen all the time, meditate on good things for people I love, try harder to communicate with my voice and touch, instead of text and messenger before I lose the art of reading faces, perfect-timed pauses, and correct use of the English language. And most importantly, I will deliver my skewed, cynical view on the smut and jokes we call current events.

Stay tuned it, I'm warming up and will be in full form soon enough.

Be like Edward Cullen. You will be rewarded!!!

Okay. So here's the deal. If you are pretentious, have something against teen slobber lust or can't stand vampires, go ahead and double click the little "X" on the top right hand corner. I am going to ooze and sigh and deep breathe and flush and spread my love for a book character like smooth nutela on a warm open bagel. God help me I am only on book three...(in a week). My poor family can only handle so much abandonment.

I am your (un)average middle class mother of two living in a nice neighborhood full of good looking people going to the gym, work, driving our SUV's, being civilized and "grown up" but something has made its way through the channels of play dates, and carpool lines...that thing...is "Twilight". (guffawww, go ahead) ((gasp if you must!)) I was a skeptic. Truly. I made fun of a friend of mine: in her late 30's, child psychologist, hates scary movies- for getting truly giddy over these books. Literally, she would take in deep inhales with a squeaky sound a glisten in her eyes. I must admit, since reading about Edward Cullen, I glisten in different places. (wink wink).

Short and sweet. The book IS about teens. It IS about vampires, but it has this fluidity and complexity that seems to be far more heart-unearthing than I remember being able to process as a teenager. Edward is the epitome (hence, written by a woman) of everything any woman with a heartbeat would want....

He is brooding and dark, aloof and distant, but absolutely intense when his full attention is focused on a subject. (in my dreams its me, and god help me I turn to mush in my ...that's not telling you HALF of it) He is over 100 years old in the solid and chiseled body of a 17-year old...which by the way, makes it illegal, but whose really paying attention? That is what clenches the deal. His wisdom and level-headed selflessness mixed in with teen pheromones and unabated sexual tension.(double sigh) He uses old English and has sweet smelling breath that makes his prey dizzy. I picture the smell of a man's dorm room with sweet familiarity of home-cooked bread. He is attentive and dangerous, jealous and protective but time has made him reasonable. He is tormented and ever present.

My husband would argue that a man that watches you sleep should be reported to the local police department, and a man that says: "I don't want to exist without you" is codependent, and possibly, but let's stay with the fantasy. The agony of him wanting her, in a lascivious way, in a primal way, and his restraint. (sigh). Every woman wants to be indispensable, distracting to a man to the point of frustration and then on top of it, loved to a degree unmeasurable by our emotional minds.

I say this. If Edward Cullen existed out there, I would do crazy things...unimaginable things to please, torture and envelope him. I actually picture myself metamorphosing into a feline-like Victoria Secret angel all in one fall swoop of his heavy hand and overfilled eyes. BRING IT ON. If any of you out there can replicate his demeanor, capacity for dark subtle wit, humor and permeable hotness...I. AM. YOURS.

Did I go on too long? Like a star-crossed teen? I know, I know...Ive lost my mind. But life is longer, weeks can be monotonous and if I get a guilt-free cheap thrill dreaming that my own personal Edward will appear ...OK, I will stop and get back to my book(s).

Give a little bit...Love and Gratefulness.

I haven't written one of these in a long time, and I find it quite the fun little challenge to make a gratitude list when I'm not particularly in the best mood. Its kind of like working out when your hungover, or making love when you feel fat (as a woman). It forces you to get out of your pity-party head and serve a greater purpose of contentedness or at the very least....awareness. So here goes.

10 Things to be grateful about RIGHT NOW:

1. The way children (and my baby) wake up in simplicity and happiness. Always smiling to greet the day. When do we let our minds change that?

2. A good country song that makes you feel empowered like Sarah Darling's "Jack of Hearts". Get out there ladies and demand more for love. Best lyric: "..with an ice-cube in his chest"...nice!

3. The sweet feel of a warm breeze on exposed skin makes you want to expose more. Nothing in the world like natural aphrodisiacs.

4. The gift you give by telling people you love that you love them....randomly and unexpected. It is a healthy addiction...making people's day.

5. Sunshine. Your breath. The absence of any physical disability, pain, or incompetency RIGHT NOW.

6. The possibility of your future. One minute from now, one hour, one week, one decade, one lifetime. It is all happening and it all changes, opens up and allows for anything...Accept that, and run with the gift of it.

7. Friendships that make you feel safe, let you laugh at life, yourself and the continuum of your mistakes despite their best efforts. Friendship helps us stand up, step back and step up!

8. A good joke with perfect timing and after shocks of giggletude.

9. Facebook and the (sometimes annoying) ability to reconnect with all kinds of past haunts, associates, memories and also its ability to make you feel like people ARE around, and interested in your life....even if on a seemingly-superficial electronic wave...bottom line is we DO care enough to check, comment and update. That's something.

10. Heart flutters and stomach pangs....from the hot person in line at Starbucks, the cubicle over, the child at the front door when you get home, or the lover in the bed waiting for you. It rocks.

Love hard, give more and spend a little time being grateful today. Make a list no matter what your mood. I dare you to stay blurry, or crabby or blah after one...Somehow, somewhere the positive vibes reverberate through you, bounce out and spill all over the world around you.