Friday, September 19, 2008

Hanky "Banky" Paulson and Frank to save the free world?

Okay, Okay I admit it. I have become literally obsessed with the financial markets. It stems from my college days with a day-trading father and my measly "penny-stock" trading, but this should be fascinating to anyone.

Today is going to be a wild wild ride! Short sellers are temporarily banned (and being unfairly blamed for all the demise of wall street...come on? Who is regulating credit swaps? or piss-poor risk management at the top ranks of financial corporations!)Scape goats are nifty discretionary tools and I'm sure there are shaunky shorters, but generalizations make me crazy.

A very angry man walked into my home last night after his bank's stock(which happens to be "clean" and one of the best market caps in the industry) plummeted 43% by midday and then closed in the green. That my friends, is rumor mongering reaping rewards for someone....THAT is your problem. So..what now? Government guarantees on mutual funds and depository banks. SEC regulations and emergency rules. All l can say is these issues feel like that funny "Whac-a-mole" game at the arcades. You get a mallet and stare down about 5 holes, each one with a popping up mole head(aka new financial crisis issue). I picture Hank Paulson, Bernanke, Barney Frank and Nancy Pelosi all standing in a baseball outfielder's position with a mallet in hand.

On a day like this, when there are so many bad-mouthing angry journalists, and even more bitter bank employees wondering about their own destiny, it is only fitting to throw a monsoon of good vibe, peace, calm and loving serenity into the growing void of black thick-striped suits and stressed out pessimistic circles of the soul-searching money hungry masses. I have never heard more media members and pundits say: "This too shall pass." Even the most drone-like are getting philosophical in times like these. It's cute.

This weeks insanity requires more than a mere shimmy and kiss-blow. No, we need to pull in some hari Krishna's, burn some smudge sticks, have tantric sex in honor of settled consumer confidence and peace on a global level. We need smelling salts and Native American chants and collective meditation. Or....we could just sit back and see what the Fed finally lands on...that might be easier. Eh...errr....let's do that. I don't feel up for tantric anything right now.

Stay tuned. After this rant (which was steeping for days) I will get uber frivolous. We can talk about fall fashion colors like purple or whatever the feck Megan Fox thinks a woman should be able to say sexually, you know...the meat of life. Ha...I said meat. Hold on to your bespoke britches!

Love and closing options. Sex and short puts. Peace and government guaranteed mutual funds.

1 comment:

dadshouse said...

Hey, no posts for a week. What's up? Out modeling? Do share... (a picture is worth a 1,000 blog posts... :-)